Now, the Fully Vaxxed Sneetches
Had deltoids with scars.
The Plain-Deltoid Sneetches
Had none upon thars.
Those scars weren't so big.
They were really so small.
You might think such a thing
Wouldn't matter at all.
But, because they had scars,
All the Scar-Deltoid Sneetches
Would brag, “We're the best
Kind of Sneetch on the beaches.”
With their snoots in the air,
They would sniff and they’d snort,
“We'll have nothing to do
With the Plain-Deltoid sort!”
And whenever they could,
They would not let them in,
They'd send them home, sulking,
All full of chagrin.
When the Scar-Deltoid Sneetches
Signed up to play ball,
Could a Plain-Deltoid get in the game…?
Not at all.
You only could play
If your deltoids had scars
And the Plain-Deltoid players
Had none upon thars.
When the Scar-Deltoid Sneetches
Had parties, ordeals
And gathered together
For restaurant meals,
They never invited
The Plain-Deltoid Sneetches;
They left them out cold,
In the dark in their breeches.
They kept them away.
Never let them come close.
And that's how they treated them
Dose after dose.
But how’d it all start?
How’d those Sneetches get scars
And split from the Sneetches
Who had none upon thars?
Well it’s said they were frightened
Those once happy Sneetches
Of a spec in the air,
So they closed down the beaches!
All the Sneetches stayed home,
The streets were all cleared
And they shuttered inside
From the spec they all feared.
And as they were fretting
And worrying about SARS…
A stranger zipped up
In the strangest of cars!
“My friends,” he announced
In a voice gruff and grouchy,
“My name is Sylvester
McScience McFauci.
“And I've heard of your troubles,
I have a solution -
A once-in-a-century
McFine Revolution.
“To begin, just one thing
Is all that I ask -
Just place on your face
This adorable mask.”
And the scared little Sneetches
Just had to believe
So their little Sneetch houses
They could finally leave.
And they cheered, oh they cheered,
“We don’t have to be scared!
As long as our faces
Are no longer bared.”
But when they looked ‘round,
They all looked the same
And their little Sneetch hearts
Quickly filled up with shame.
Why were they unhappy?
They'd all paid their dues.
So why were they feeling
The mask-wearing blues?
They hadn't an answer,
They hadn't a clue,
So they looked to McFauci;
He'd know what to do!
Yes, Sylvester McScience
McFauci was wiser.
His answer? A magic machine -
The McPfizer!
With its miracle potion
Put right in their arms,
They’d leave scarred-armed heroes
(No worries ‘bout harms).
And the Sneetches knew not
What this new-tech thing did.
Each just clambered inside
Like a good little kid.
Oh, but some of the Sneetches
Decided to wait,
Unsure if they needed
This uncertain fate.
And that's when they knew,
All those Scar-Deltoid Sneetches,
How they fin'lly could tell
The best Sneetch on the beaches.
If Plain-Deltoids passed
When they were out walking,
They’d hike right on past them
Without even talking.
Then ONE day, it seems…
While the Scar-Deltoid Sneetches
Were strutting their stuff
On the warm, summer beaches,
The Plain-Deltoid Sneetches
Called out as they neared,
“Your ‘permanent’ scars,
Why, they’ve all disappeared!”
And the Scar-Deltoid Sneetches
Said, “That cannot be…”
But the Plain-Deltoid Sneetches
Said, “Look down and see!”
So they looked at their arms
In the light of the dawn
And saw nothing at all;
The scars were all gone!
And the Sneetches who all
Had plain arms from the start,
Said, “Ha! Now you bastards
Can’t tell us apart!”
But McFauci had something else
Shoved up his sleeve.
He said, “Only you
Take your masks off and breathe!”
Because my advice
You've judiciously heeded
You've taken the jab,
So your mask isn’t needed!”
And the Once-Scar-Clad Sneetches
Said, “That's how they'll know!
That we are above them,
And they are below.”
But it didn’t take long
For the Mask-Wearing Sneetches
To take theirs off, too,
And walk free on the beaches.
And Sylvester McScience
McFauci said then,
“You ALL need to put on your masks
Once again!”
So, afraid of the spec
And adoring McFauci,
They put on their masks,
No matter how ouchy.
Then dawning their face masks,
Those Mask-Wearing Sneetches
Returned to their spots
On the warm, summer beaches.
But the sadness returned
As they basked in the sun,
And the Once-Scar-Clad Sneetches
Said, “What can be done?”
“I have here an answer,”
McFauci said, grinning.
“I’ll scar you again;
Then you’ll all know who’s winning!"
And the sullen-faced Sneetches
Looked down at their arms
And feeling unspecial,
They fell for his charms.
“It’s all you will need;
This time is the last!
So hurry in now,
And get your shot fast!”
“You Once-Scar-Clad Sneetches,
You've all tried the hardest.
So all it will cost you
Is Myocydartis!”
Some didn't hear him,
And some didn't care.
All stood there in line
Like a day at the fair.
But sooner than later,
Those scars faded, too,
And the Once-Scar-Clad Sneetches
Knew not what to do.
But the Plain-Deltoid Sneetches
Were starting to doubt
What this spec-fearing, mask-wearing
Thing was about.
So they took off their masks
And broke out in cheer
While the Once-Scar-Clad Sneetches
Just ran off in fear.
And the Plain-Deltoid Sneetches,
Who were Plain-Facing, too,
Just chuckled and smiled,
For this time, they knew.
The fresh air felt nice
On their maskless, bright faces
And their unblemished arms
With no jabs, no disgraces.
They packed up that night
And many now say,
They all headed north
The very next day.
They cheered on the truckers
And laughed at McFauci.
Some of them even
Parked out on a couchy.
And no one e’er heard
From those Once-Scar-Clad Sneetches.
Some say they've been spotted
In masks on the beaches.
It’s rumored they re-jab their arms
When they’re told
By McFauci, who now
Is eight hundred years old.
And they found a new way
To divide up the Sneetches
And instantly tell
Who is who
On the beaches.
~ Dr. Amy - The Truth Psychologist
Dr Amy that’s good
they said with hooray
in hopes of another
good story some day
😂😂 Feeling unspecial - you nailed it!
And the sullen-faced Sneetches Looked down at their arms
And feeling unspecial, They fell for his charms.